Tuesday, December 31, 2019

2020 Vision

Okay, that pun has already been way overused, but I couldn't help it. Everyone is talking about it: the start of a new decade. So much has happened in the last ten years! I went from being a world traveler alongside my husband, and putting in countless hours at the easel--to being a mom of two, and moving from Texas to Colorado. I made many amazing new friends and connections. I started a fitness and health journey. I found a great church community. I painted a LOT. 

In 2019 there were a few huge personal milestones: We bought our dream home! Our daughter turned 5 and started kindergarten, and our son turned 1. 

From a professional standpoint, there were a few highlights in 2019, including my first feature article in a magazine (the December 2019/January 2020 issue of Southwest Art Magazine, which you can read here), and joining MadeforArtists.net, an art instruction streaming service. 

But mostly 2019 required learning how to be patient (there's that word again!) with myself and this chapter of my life. I am tethered to two young children and their ever increasing demands. The house, the kids... all of it took away from time in the studio and so, 2019 ended up being more of a year for character development and painful refinement--or, "The Year of the House and Toddler" than one of professional growth. I painted when I could, but it wasn't much, and my focus suffered. 

However... it takes some grit to realize that it’s okay to step back for a time in order to do the right thing. On a daily basis I laid aside my heart's desire so that I could meet the needs of my most precious treasures. There is no guarantee that 2020 will be easier. I’ll definitely be taking on more commitments. But hopefully I’ll be going into it with a better sense of what I’m capable of and what I can bring to the world. Maybe what I have to offer is not so much an end product but some insight on the journey itself. In the past I’ve let anxiety build up as I anticipate “losing” out on painting time, or opportunities, etc, and I haven’t always wholeheartedly embraced this chapter of life for what it is. My children are in such a sweet spot. Everett is into literally everything, but he’s such a lover, and so stinking cute! Cecelia is talking like a little grown-up, yet she's still so innocent. Someday I’ll look back at 2019 and be able to more clearly communicate what it was that I learned, and how it made me a better person, but for now I’m willing to reflect with gratitude and look ahead with a kind of steady and quiet expectation. There are no jitters - I don’t get the butterflies anymore. I’ve graduated to a new level of anticipation, one of confidence and trust that everything will work out in the end. So... what is my new word for 2020? Wholeheartedness. 

Whatever your goals or resolutions, I hope 2020 brings beauty, love, and joy to you and yours. Happy New Year, everyone!



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